Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Fear

OBJECTIVE
8 mi. incl. warm up, 4 x 1 mi. @ 6:20 w/800 meter jogging recoveries, & cool down

ACHIEVED
WU 1.90 mi.
6:20/6:22/6:22/6:17
CD 1.39 mi.

5:28 AM 75° 88% 8 mph

This was one of those workouts that loomed ominously on my training schedule. Four one-mile repeats at 6:20. When I walked out the door this morning it was warmer than I had hoped it would be. I eased my way over to the high school track and started hammering away. The wind was tough on one of the straightaways. It seems it was slowing me somewhere from 5 - 10 seconds per mile with the same perceived effort. Anyway, little by little I was able to get it done. When I say little by little, my mental approach was that I simply needed to do 16 laps at 95 seconds each. I then broke that do into 4 laps with a 5-minute jogging break. While actually running, I further broke each mile into 4 laps and each lap into 4 100-meter segments. Focus on each segment and don't worry about what was to come. It wasn't easy and as a result there is satisfaction in the completion.

I pushed hard over the last 2 laps of the last mile so I could hit my 6:20 goal (actually came in at 6:17). This got me thinking as I began the cool down back to the house ....

I'm in a bit of a mental trap right now which is holding me back. Several of my running friends have gently pointed this out to me at different times over the past couple of months. Specifically, Stephanie, Josh, and Jonathan have each said something about "going for it" or "breaking through" etc. I've though about this a bit and it's all still crystallizing for me so I suspect it's part of my learning process and maturation as a runner. I think it's the "fear" that's a problem for me. The fear of blowing up, failing, intense discomfort, pain, .... These are some of the fears which are holding me back right now. Running takes courage. The willingness to press on and push through to achieve. I suppose I'll have more to say about this in the future.

Today's last mile of the repeats was setting up to be a 6:26 or slower. I said, "No, it's not going down this way." Over the last half mile, I pushed and it hurt. I'm physically able to achieve my goals. Am I mentally able?

PRE RUN
weight 162
water

POST RUN
chocolate milk, multivitamin @ Kashi GoLean cereal w/1% milk

7 comments:

pcb said...

Buck up!

Cory said...

Who are you to be throwing that advice around? Why aren't you running the half marathon, Tony Robbins?

pcb said...

Because I don't have as much natural running talent as you do - I just plug along - you know the differences in our phyches - you love the competitive part and I like to enjoy the scenery.

Cory said...

Oh brother! You really are Tony Robbins talking like that!

I've never been a natural anything (unless it's a natural disaster)!

Anonymous said...

That was a good, hard workout....good job! Good approach, too, on getting it done. That, in itself, has got to build some mental toughness. All in prep for that upcoming half....

Steph said...

"Running won't kill you, you'll pass out first" - Anonymous
When I race, I like to feel that I've left it all out there. It's ok if all I can do is lay down and shiver for a while.
However, when I train, I am more conservative. You can't put your body through that much stress too often. So train smart, race hard, And don't beat yourself up too much!
Keep up the good work Cory, your dedication is an inspiration.
Steph

Cory said...

Steph,

Thanks for the comment. I really like the quote! And you do race fearlessly ... like you don't mind collapsing and shivering for awhile in the aftermath!

Hope you have a great time in China. I read there may be some visa restrictions on US citizens due to swine flu precautions by the Chinese government.